Keeper of The Home...Part 2

photo courtesy of www.flickr.com

So, now that we all know what and where our homes are to us...what now??

Well, for our study this morning (which was supposed to post automatically yesterday morning...except yesterday was not the 12th...OOPS), I want us each to think about our day to day lives. They are all different, I'm sure. I have been a college student mom, a part-time working mom, a full-time working mom, and a stay at home mom. Each season of my life has made it easier or harder to keep my home. I won't lie to you...it is much easier to keep my home and create that sanctuary now that my kids are in school than it was when I was working full time. But don't you think that is totally not coincidental in God's plan?

Do you think that God purposed or planned for women to work outside of the home, or do you think that consequences of sin have caused women to work outside of the home? I believe the latter because it was the truth in my own personal life. I certainly don't condemn working women, and am one myself, but I know just as every other working mom knows...when you are gone from your home for 8-10 hours a day, it is much more difficult to keep it the way the Lord intends us to and create that sanctuary than if you were in it all day. I am not saying here that working moms are any less able than stay at home moms to keep their homes. Shocker?? No, I believe that it will be harder for a working mom, but it can definitely be done. My pastor's wife always says this and it makes so much sense. She says that ALL women are commanded by the word of God to have their families at the top of their priority list. That means above themselves, above their pleasures, above their own jobs if they have one. The word of God doesn't tell us that we can't care about ourselves, that we can't have our own desires and goals that we are trying to fulfill or that we can't go to work everyday to support our families and be that helper to our husbands. No, but what the word does say is that your family STILL has to be your top priority, so when you come home late in the afternoon and want to just zone out in front of the tv because you have had a long day...TOO BAD. You choosing to add more to your plate doesn't give you the free pass to not have to cook supper, wash clothes, or spend quality time with your people. Those things still must be your top priority. So what I learned from this was that you can certainly be outside of your home as much or as little as you would like, just know that the more you are...the harder it is to get those things done that are commanded of you and what God cares most about you doing of you inside of it.

Now, here is the kicker. I have so many friends who take the glory road of "I'm a stay at home mom...look at me." I could not disagree more with that attitude. Because guess what? Going to the gym, meeting friends for lunch, taking sewing classes, playing Pokino, going out for "girls night" on the weekends...still means that you are OUT OF YOUR HOME, but your home must still be your top priority. And, just because you "stay home" doesn't mean that you are taking your responsibility with the commands that God has placed on you any more seriously than the next person. What are you doing with your time and how do you feel about what you are doing.

AGAIN, it is all about your heart. Your home is not the sticks and bricks that have built your house. It is the realm of your family. And how you keep it depends on what is in your heart.

Next week for our final discussion, we will talk about exactly what is in our hearts and how to make sure that our families are our top priorities!! See you all next week!!

Being a Keeper of the Home...What does that mean anyway??

So we all hear that we are called to be "Keepers of the Home" but what does that mean and how do we do that??

First, lets remind ourselves of what Titus 2 tells us...

"The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."

Titus 2:3-5

That passage is so powerful and is so stock full of direction and inspiration for us as wives and mothers. I think though that the last 8 words are the most important. "That the Word of God be not blasphemed." Have you ever thought that you are a blasphemer? I certainly would not consider myself one. I think of people like Judas and King Herod and atheists when I think of blasphemy, but the reality is, if you are not living and doing what God has called you to do, you are spitting in his face. YIKES!!

Y'all, I will be very honest with you. This is extremely difficult for me. I am one of those people that has regrets, worries about everything, is always looking back to what I could've done differently and looking ahead to the next phase in my life. I rarely am able to live in the here and now (which by the way is something that this scripture has taught me to do). When my kids were little, all I wanted them to do was move on to the next milestone. The second they started walking I was ready to potty train, and as soon as they were potty trained I was searching for a preschool. I have such a tough time just being. Now that my kids are older I am ready for a do-over. But guess what? Life doesn't offer those. We can't go back and change anything just as we can't skip the parts of our lives that we want to hurry through. But what we can do is serve the Lord through our families each and every day without ceasing in order to honor God...so "that the word of God be not blasphemed."

How does that fit with being a keeper of the home?? Well, I keep my house cleaned, my kids are always well dressed, I even read them a bedtime story at night and show my husband attention every now and then. So doesn't that mean that I am being a Keeper of my Home? The first thing I had to do to figure this out was have myself a good old soul searching.

Daily chores are certainly part of keeping your home. But where is your heart while you are busy in your day to day activities? That is what defines you as a keeper of your home. Are you singing praises to the Lord that you have a family to take care of or are you cursing your husband because he never puts his shoes away?? You can read a bedtime story to your children but are you whole heartedly purposing to teach them what is right, to instill values in them that they will take with them as they grow? Or are you, like me so often, just trying to get through the story so that you can get that kitchen cleaned?

This is difficult, I know, but the first thing I had to realize to get on this track was that my HOME was not my HOUSE. Does that make sense?? So where is HOME you ask?? Home is anywhere my family is. If we are on vacation, HOME is our condo/hotel/RV. If we are at church, HOME is our pew. You think I am crazy?? Let me explain...keeping your home is very different than keeping your house. Keeping your home comes from your heart. It is a desire, a purpose to take care of those we love. It is not the day to day chores, it is how we do the day to day chores. If you have the most spotless house in the neighborhood, but you're mad that you had to clean it or won't let your kids back in once it's clean (don't lie you know you've thought it), you are keeping your HOUSE but not your HOME. Get it??

So how in the world can I call a church pew home?? Well, because to me, my home is wherever my family is. Right now we are living with my parents while we are building the house we plan to live in for the rest of our lives. Does that mean that because I am in my mother's house that I don't have a home to keep? Not at all. I keep my home here just as I would anywhere. I am still cooking supper and enjoying dinner with my family at the kitchen table. Sometimes with my parents joining and sometimes just us. I still read to my children at night and talk with them about their day and pray with them. My husband and I are still having lunch together and spending time just the two of us. I am still keeping my home even though I don't have a house...does that make any sense at all? Now, let me say this. Every choice we make, makes it easier or harder to keep our homes. Does living with my parents make it harder to keep my home. YOU BETTER BELIEVE! Why??? Because all I want to do is sit in the kitchen and chit chat with my mom and sister. My mom and sister also exercise every evening together and I want to join them...BUT I CAN'T. I have to remember what my top priority is. Its my family. Whether I want it to be or not, God has called a woman to be the keeper of her home, with her family as her top priority. Period. Like it or not its what scripture says.

So now that we know what HOME is...What do you want your home to be?? What does it look like. And no, I'm not talking paint color! For me, I want my home to be a refuge from the outside world. A safe haven for my family, that sanctuary that you can come to and be secure even from the worst situations. Is it that way all of the time? No, absolutely not, but I desire it in my heart and I have purposed that I will create that for my family, at all costs. What is it to you??

Ponder on that this week and lets meet back here next Wednesday morning to discuss what our homes are to us and how we make them what we want them to be without going crazy...And coming soon, the Mom debate...how much time do you have to spend in your HOUSE to keep your HOME...cause I'm not trying to be imprisoned in there y'all!!! Stay tuned for that fun!!

BLASPHEMERS y'all...think about that because that is what just did me in!!

Post! Post! Post!! I can't wait to hear your thoughts on this!! See y'all next week!!

Lets Talk Gosselin

Hey Ladies! We haven't had a chance to chat Gosselin here lately with my hectic schedule, but now that Im back on track I am just wondering what everyone is thinking of the new house, Kate's new look, the puppies (OH BOY), etc. I hope you have been tuning in and loving it as I have. I have to admit though, I am almost as excited about the Duggar's tonight and find that I have so much in common with them, even though they seem so weird on the surface. I love that Michelle, she is a doll. So tomorrow we may be talking Duggar!!!

The only negative comments I have to make about the Gosselins these last few weeks is that Kate is starting to get a little cocky again. I don't know if she is just tired or what, but she is not the same Kate from years past. That makes me so sad. Also, the twins seem to be crying out for just a crumb of attention. I am not really understanding that either, even though my oldest is just a few weeks younger than Mady and Cara and she acts the very same way so how is that for reality tv!! I am loving the house though and I have to say that the little slideshow of the old house last night had me in tears. I love those 6 babies so much and to see them just grow up before our eyes is so devastating, huh?? Now, tell me what you think about Jon and Kate Plus 8 lately. I have missed our Gosselin conversations!!

Book of the Month Club

The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace

Hey Everyone! Can you believe it is March already?? Time is just flying by! I am so excited to share a book with you this month that absolutely changed my life. I first read The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace when I was first married...almost 12 years ago. I was anything but submissive, as I grew up in a house where my mom ruled the roost and both of my parents were extremely unhappy. I am also a bit of a control freak, by my own admission, so submission was not even in my vocabulary. But, the study began at my church and I had to go. I learned so much from this book that it is now a given that it will be my gift at any and every bridal shower I am ever invited to. With chapters on issues like home, love, respect, intimacy, communication, conflict, anger, fear, and loneliness this book pretty much covers it all. I cannot tell you what this book has done for my life and how many people this book has affected in that same way in my little circle. This book has been passed around and passed around and believe it or not, I had to buy a new one because I couldn't even remember who had mine last to get it back. If you are struggling with submission, or if you think you have it all under control, I can promise you this, you will be humbled and amazed by what Martha has to say about God's plan and purpose for us in our homes. This is one of those books though that may touch a nerve. You must humble yourself and remember why you are reading it because the author does not go easy and wastes no time digging up those underlying issues that you may not even be aware you have. Please consider going over to Amazon and at least reading an excerpt from the book. You can get to it by just clicking it in my Amazon widget. I saw this morning that you can get the book for less than $4.00 plus shipping which is nothing in comparison to what you will gain from it. Enjoy!! And if you read it, please post back and let me know!! Happy Reading!!

Tips and Tidbits Tuesday

Good morning everyone!! I have been leaving yall hanging on my tips and tidbits these last few Tuesdays because my life has been extremely hectic and I do apologize. I have really missed yall and am so glad to be back!! Today, this tip is for all of you who battle that darn flat surface electric cooktop. Yeah, I know that you have heard of all of these products that are supposed to clean that funk off of the cooktop...but THEY NEVER WORK. I have battled mine for 2 years now and it was driving me insane until my mom broke out the ZUD!!!

This is a product that when seen on the shelf it looks as if Uncle Bubba made it himself and then decorated the can. It's priced that way too(good thing), but this stuff works I tell you!

Here is my testimony...a few weeks back I was cooking a roast and folding clothes in the living room at the same time. Long story short when I came back into the kitchen to check on my roast it had been overflowing for quite some time and I had a mess on my hands. My mom came in a little bit later and just whipped out the Zud and cleaned that disgusting stuck on that surface mess in just a few seconds. Yall, I would have spent 3 days using the squirt stuff that comes with the cooktop. Believe what I say and go get you some Zud. It works better than Bar Keepers Friend...and any other product you want to put it up against I promise...HAPPY CLEANING!!!

Don't forget tomorrow is our beginning study of Being a Keeper of the Home and what that means. Please join me on this walk and lets figure it out together!!